| Son: "Dad, why does
love-making makes you feels good?" Dad: "Just like digging in your nose, it's feels good, right!" Son: "Why is it that guys don't usually feel as good as gals?" Dad: "Just like when you dig in your nose, it's your nose that feel good, not your finger!" Son: "Then why do gals feel bad when they are raped?" Dad: "If a stranger comes along and digs in your nose, will you feel the same way?" Son: "When girls are having their menstruation, why don't they usually want to have sex?" Dad: "If your nose is bleeding, will you still want your nose to be dug?" Son: "Dad, one last question ... why don't guys like to wear condoms when they make love?" Dad: "Would you want to wear a glove when you dig your nose?" A father was explaining the facts of life to his son. After covering the basic biology, he moved on to the finer points of love-making: Father: "One thing to keep in mind, son, is that different women say different things during the act, even if you are doing the same thing." Son: "What do you mean, Dad?" Father: "Well, for example, their words will vary according to their occupation. For example, a prostitute will tend to say, 'Are you done yet?' On the other hand, a nymphomaniac will ask, 'Are you done already?'" Son: "What do other women say?" Father: "Well, a school teacher will say, 'We are going to do this over and over again until you get it right!' A nurse will say, 'This won't hurt one bit.'" Son: "I thought they said, 'Pull down your pants and bend over.'" Father: "That's male nurses. Moving on, a bank teller will say, 'Substantial penalty for early withdrawal.' A stewardess will say, 'Place this over your mouth and nose and breathe normally.'" Son: "And what does mother say?" Father: "She says, 'Ohhhh tonight Harrrrryy?? I just spent $35 to have my hair done. Can't you wait till tomorrow?'" |